1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:01:17,542 --> 00:01:21,958 ABOUT JOAN 4 00:02:09,083 --> 00:02:13,000 Directed by Laurent Larivière 5 00:02:41,625 --> 00:02:43,958 My name is Joan. Joan Verra. 6 00:02:44,583 --> 00:02:46,875 It sounds masculine in French, 7 00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:50,292 but it's common in Ireland, my father's country. 8 00:02:51,333 --> 00:02:53,042 It's spelled J-O-A-N. 9 00:02:53,208 --> 00:02:55,333 But I hate being called Joanne. 10 00:02:55,625 --> 00:02:56,917 It always happens. 11 00:02:57,583 --> 00:03:01,458 Some even pronounce it John, like John Wayne! Absurd. 12 00:03:02,375 --> 00:03:03,542 It's Joan. 13 00:03:07,083 --> 00:03:09,208 I was born in the early 60s. 14 00:03:10,042 --> 00:03:12,500 My parents met in Saint-Nazaire. 15 00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:15,625 My mother was a fairly free young woman, 16 00:03:16,167 --> 00:03:17,542 very much in love. 17 00:03:18,833 --> 00:03:20,917 My father left Ireland at 18 18 00:03:21,083 --> 00:03:23,167 to work in the shipyards. 19 00:03:23,875 --> 00:03:27,125 He met my mother at the launch of the liner France, 20 00:03:27,458 --> 00:03:30,125 on May 11th, 1960. 21 00:03:30,375 --> 00:03:33,333 I believed there was proof of that moment. 22 00:03:33,875 --> 00:03:35,083 But there wasn't. 23 00:03:35,917 --> 00:03:38,625 I was even sure I'd held the photo 24 00:03:38,792 --> 00:03:41,042 of them both next to the ship 25 00:03:41,208 --> 00:03:42,875 in the joyful crowd. 26 00:03:43,625 --> 00:03:44,667 It's absurd. 27 00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:47,375 That image was purely in my mind. 28 00:03:48,708 --> 00:03:52,000 I'd heard the story so often, it had become real. 29 00:03:54,375 --> 00:03:56,833 That's also how memories are made. 30 00:09:20,333 --> 00:09:21,500 What do you want? 31 00:20:45,875 --> 00:20:46,833 That's good. 32 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,167 Two... 33 00:20:50,417 --> 00:20:51,292 Three... 34 00:20:51,833 --> 00:20:52,833 Four... 35 00:23:50,792 --> 00:23:52,458 We've been worried sick! 36 00:23:52,667 --> 00:23:53,958 Don't start. 37 00:23:54,542 --> 00:23:55,833 Come here, my baby. 38 00:24:42,167 --> 00:24:44,500 Nathan is the best thing in my life. 39 00:24:44,958 --> 00:24:47,458 All mothers say that, but for me it's true. 40 00:24:47,875 --> 00:24:50,625 It isn't true that he saved my life 41 00:24:50,917 --> 00:24:52,833 or gave it meaning. 42 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:55,750 I don't believe all that nonsense. 43 00:24:56,208 --> 00:24:58,042 We know life has no meaning, 44 00:24:58,542 --> 00:25:00,250 with offspring or without. 45 00:25:01,125 --> 00:25:02,708 Ma'am, your cigarette. 46 00:25:02,875 --> 00:25:04,750 Oh, yes, sorry. 47 00:25:26,792 --> 00:25:28,167 Take him, Dad. 48 00:27:23,833 --> 00:27:25,750 Tim Ardenne speaking. 49 00:27:26,375 --> 00:27:28,167 - It's me. - Yes? 50 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:29,750 Who? 51 00:27:30,500 --> 00:27:33,167 You must have the wrong number, madam. 52 00:27:33,750 --> 00:27:34,875 Miss. 53 00:27:35,708 --> 00:27:39,083 I'm sorry, miss, I don't have time now. 54 00:27:39,250 --> 00:27:40,875 My wife has vanished. 55 00:27:41,458 --> 00:27:44,375 I say my wife, but we're not married. 56 00:27:44,667 --> 00:27:46,792 I hate the idea of belonging. 57 00:27:46,958 --> 00:27:48,167 It's just quicker. 58 00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:50,875 Yes, I understand, of course. 59 00:27:51,417 --> 00:27:53,917 She left one night, like that. 60 00:27:54,083 --> 00:27:56,000 Almost without warning. 61 00:27:56,500 --> 00:27:59,250 She just told me, "Don't worry." 62 00:27:59,958 --> 00:28:04,042 Those words are ideal to make someone worry, aren't they? 63 00:28:04,417 --> 00:28:06,625 It wasn't very wise of her. 64 00:28:09,667 --> 00:28:11,375 I'm sorry, my love. 65 00:28:11,542 --> 00:28:12,500 It's all right. 66 00:28:12,875 --> 00:28:15,500 I can come right away if you want. 67 00:28:15,667 --> 00:28:17,583 No, really, it's ok. 68 00:28:19,375 --> 00:28:21,333 It does me good being here. 69 00:28:30,333 --> 00:28:31,375 One more time. 70 00:28:47,208 --> 00:28:48,917 I need a volunteer. 71 00:28:59,208 --> 00:29:00,500 Your weakness, James? 72 00:29:02,083 --> 00:29:06,125 Off the top of my head, my generosity. I'm too genuine. 73 00:29:06,417 --> 00:29:07,958 It often deceives me. 74 00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:12,625 He means in this exercise 75 00:29:12,792 --> 00:29:13,958 in particular. 76 00:29:17,167 --> 00:29:18,500 Any ideas? 77 00:29:20,583 --> 00:29:22,083 He neglects his back. 78 00:29:23,583 --> 00:29:24,333 Exactly. 79 00:29:25,417 --> 00:29:28,083 I told him. It's the same at mah-jong. 80 00:29:35,750 --> 00:29:37,333 From the beginning. 81 00:29:40,250 --> 00:29:42,292 That man's not very nice. 82 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:45,333 Why do you say that? 83 00:29:46,083 --> 00:29:48,167 Grandpa's always on the floor. 84 00:29:51,708 --> 00:29:53,875 Grandpa agrees to it. 85 00:29:54,042 --> 00:29:55,208 One more time. 86 00:29:55,375 --> 00:29:57,958 Learn to fall, to pick yourself up. 87 00:29:58,208 --> 00:30:00,000 Talk about a life metaphor. 88 00:30:00,167 --> 00:30:02,542 When you fall, you hurt yourself, period. 89 00:30:03,833 --> 00:30:05,667 They lie to us, Nathan. 90 00:30:22,417 --> 00:30:24,042 What's she up to? 91 00:30:47,792 --> 00:30:48,833 Nearly ready. 92 00:30:55,833 --> 00:30:57,167 What took so long? 93 00:30:57,833 --> 00:30:59,708 I couldn't find my bag, sorry. 94 00:30:59,875 --> 00:31:01,000 Let's go. 95 00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:42,083 I tried my best to resist. 96 00:32:43,333 --> 00:32:44,958 But it's uncontrollable. 97 00:32:48,792 --> 00:32:50,250 I feel as if 98 00:32:50,583 --> 00:32:51,792 I'm living again. 99 00:32:54,667 --> 00:32:56,583 Not that I felt dead before. 100 00:32:57,583 --> 00:32:59,083 Or sad or anything. 101 00:32:59,917 --> 00:33:01,625 I was already very happy. 102 00:33:02,625 --> 00:33:03,667 But now... 103 00:33:06,917 --> 00:33:08,167 It's much more. 104 00:33:10,750 --> 00:33:12,583 Who knows where it'll lead, 105 00:33:12,917 --> 00:33:14,792 but I have to experience it. 106 00:33:15,333 --> 00:33:17,042 You can't even communicate. 107 00:33:18,042 --> 00:33:19,417 You're wrong. 108 00:33:23,917 --> 00:33:25,667 We communicate perfectly. 109 00:33:26,042 --> 00:33:29,125 Our bodies do the talking. They speak the truth. 110 00:33:29,292 --> 00:33:31,750 That's a load of crap, Mum. 111 00:33:32,875 --> 00:33:33,792 And Dad? 112 00:33:34,625 --> 00:33:37,708 I love James. I'll always love him. 113 00:33:38,542 --> 00:33:40,000 That's not the issue. 114 00:33:40,792 --> 00:33:42,875 Actually, I think it is. 115 00:33:43,958 --> 00:33:45,250 You must tell him. 116 00:33:45,750 --> 00:33:46,625 No. 117 00:33:47,708 --> 00:33:51,667 You have to tell him. I refuse to keep it to myself. 118 00:33:51,833 --> 00:33:53,208 You really want that? 119 00:33:53,542 --> 00:33:54,625 I want nothing. 120 00:33:55,875 --> 00:33:57,708 Face your responsibilities. 121 00:34:02,042 --> 00:34:03,792 You have to go now, darling. 122 00:34:26,542 --> 00:34:30,708 I cannot postpone anything, 123 00:34:31,708 --> 00:34:34,583 even if the night weighs like centuries 124 00:34:34,750 --> 00:34:37,833 on my shoulders, 125 00:34:38,667 --> 00:34:43,833 even if hesitant dawn is late in coming, 126 00:34:44,708 --> 00:34:46,542 I cannot put off my life 127 00:34:46,708 --> 00:34:49,417 to another century, 128 00:34:50,333 --> 00:34:51,833 nor my love, 129 00:34:52,125 --> 00:34:53,958 nor my cry of release. 130 00:34:54,458 --> 00:34:59,208 No, I cannot postpone the heart. 131 00:35:18,917 --> 00:35:20,333 What's going on? 132 00:35:21,333 --> 00:35:23,583 I didn't want it to be like this. 133 00:35:25,500 --> 00:35:27,000 I wanted to drop this off 134 00:35:29,208 --> 00:35:30,500 before coming back. 135 00:35:37,292 --> 00:35:38,542 I'm leaving, James. 136 00:35:38,917 --> 00:35:41,708 To go where? What is this? 137 00:35:42,500 --> 00:35:44,542 I'm leaving, that's it. 138 00:35:46,833 --> 00:35:47,917 That's it? 139 00:35:48,583 --> 00:35:49,833 That's all? 140 00:35:54,292 --> 00:35:56,375 I'm moving to Japan with Kazuo. 141 00:35:56,958 --> 00:35:57,708 Kazuo? 142 00:36:00,250 --> 00:36:01,417 To Japan? 143 00:36:06,083 --> 00:36:07,500 You know I love you. 144 00:36:07,958 --> 00:36:09,167 Yes, I know. 145 00:36:09,708 --> 00:36:10,875 I love you too. 146 00:36:13,125 --> 00:36:14,792 I've nothing against you. 147 00:36:15,625 --> 00:36:16,875 Almost nothing. 148 00:36:20,708 --> 00:36:22,792 I've seen the solicitor. 149 00:36:22,958 --> 00:36:26,000 You get my father's firm. You'll lack nothing. 150 00:36:29,917 --> 00:36:32,792 I renounce my status as a mother and wife. 151 00:36:33,875 --> 00:36:36,417 It's too hasty. You don't know what to expect. 152 00:36:37,167 --> 00:36:39,208 I can't miss out on my life. 153 00:36:46,708 --> 00:36:48,167 You're lucky. 154 00:37:28,292 --> 00:37:29,125 Hello? 155 00:37:29,292 --> 00:37:30,667 Hello, it's me. 156 00:37:30,833 --> 00:37:31,958 Nathan? 157 00:37:32,125 --> 00:37:34,000 It's night there, aren't you asleep? 158 00:37:34,167 --> 00:37:37,042 No, I'm not. I'm in France. 159 00:37:37,208 --> 00:37:38,375 In Paris? 160 00:37:38,542 --> 00:37:42,083 No, I'm not in Paris. I took a train to the station in... 161 00:37:42,500 --> 00:37:46,542 What's that little station 10 km from the house? 162 00:37:46,958 --> 00:37:48,583 Why didn't you tell me? 163 00:37:49,667 --> 00:37:50,708 Surprise. 164 00:37:50,875 --> 00:37:52,375 I have to pick you up? 165 00:37:52,542 --> 00:37:55,333 I don't want to bother you, you're busy... 166 00:37:55,542 --> 00:37:57,333 I can go back to Montreal. 167 00:37:57,542 --> 00:38:00,417 Don't be so touchy. I'm on my way. 168 00:38:00,583 --> 00:38:01,917 No, I'm kidding. 169 00:38:02,125 --> 00:38:05,125 I hitched. I'm at Mariposa, at the gate. 170 00:38:26,708 --> 00:38:28,083 My son! 171 00:38:28,417 --> 00:38:29,417 Joan. 172 00:38:30,083 --> 00:38:31,542 You can call me Mum. 173 00:38:31,708 --> 00:38:33,250 You used to hate that. 174 00:38:33,417 --> 00:38:35,750 I was too young to be a mother then. 175 00:38:35,917 --> 00:38:38,042 I need to get back to basics. 176 00:38:38,208 --> 00:38:39,917 Honoured to be part of that. 177 00:38:44,375 --> 00:38:46,083 - What? - You're very elegant. 178 00:38:46,250 --> 00:38:48,833 - Stop. - You've changed. Your walk... 179 00:38:49,000 --> 00:38:50,875 You're more self-confident. 180 00:38:51,458 --> 00:38:52,625 It's the snow. 181 00:38:52,792 --> 00:38:55,583 It's down to snowshoes, not confidence. 182 00:38:55,750 --> 00:38:57,750 How can you stand the snow? 183 00:38:57,958 --> 00:39:00,958 It hit -27° C in Montreal last winter. 184 00:39:01,125 --> 00:39:02,708 I don't think I could. 185 00:39:03,167 --> 00:39:05,250 You must come to see us one day. 186 00:39:06,292 --> 00:39:07,750 Why are you here? 187 00:39:10,042 --> 00:39:11,792 Did Tim ask you to come? 188 00:39:11,958 --> 00:39:13,250 You know he didn't. 189 00:39:16,083 --> 00:39:18,208 Is the small bedroom ok? 190 00:39:18,500 --> 00:39:20,667 Your childhood room, I mean. 191 00:39:20,833 --> 00:39:22,417 There's a big bed now. 192 00:39:22,625 --> 00:39:23,833 Anything suits me. 193 00:39:24,417 --> 00:39:26,083 It'll bring back memories. 194 00:39:32,958 --> 00:39:34,000 It's locked. 195 00:39:34,167 --> 00:39:37,375 The handle turns the other way around, remember. 196 00:39:43,667 --> 00:39:44,917 Drat... 197 00:39:46,042 --> 00:39:48,375 Silly me, the key's in the vase. 198 00:39:53,500 --> 00:39:55,167 I don't know where it is. 199 00:39:58,083 --> 00:39:59,708 Never mind. Who cares? 200 00:39:59,875 --> 00:40:03,083 The guest room suits me fine, ok. 201 00:40:33,667 --> 00:40:36,250 That unsettled me a lot as a kid. 202 00:40:36,417 --> 00:40:38,208 True, it is a bit raunchy. 203 00:40:53,958 --> 00:40:56,250 I'd forgotten how beautiful it is. 204 00:40:56,917 --> 00:40:59,375 I feel I haven't been here in ages. 205 00:40:59,625 --> 00:41:01,250 I can confirm that. 206 00:41:02,292 --> 00:41:04,417 Sorry I missed your retirement party. 207 00:41:04,583 --> 00:41:07,750 It's better this way. I'd rather see you alone. 208 00:41:08,375 --> 00:41:10,042 Me too. It's been ages? 209 00:41:10,375 --> 00:41:11,417 Yes. 210 00:41:12,167 --> 00:41:13,333 I hesitated. 211 00:41:13,875 --> 00:41:16,250 Should I come or not? 212 00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:18,375 It's good you're here. 213 00:41:19,792 --> 00:41:21,375 It was a horrible party. 214 00:41:21,833 --> 00:41:23,000 I hated it. 215 00:41:23,625 --> 00:41:26,208 Solemn farewells, forced compliments... 216 00:41:26,750 --> 00:41:27,917 What a drag. 217 00:41:28,458 --> 00:41:31,292 All I miss are the manuscripts. 218 00:41:31,792 --> 00:41:34,375 They send me a few now and then. 219 00:41:34,917 --> 00:41:36,625 There's good stuff this year. 220 00:41:38,458 --> 00:41:41,292 I forgot, you only read scientific texts. 221 00:41:41,750 --> 00:41:42,708 No. 222 00:41:43,000 --> 00:41:46,500 On the plane, I read a book of Tim's I had lying around. 223 00:41:46,833 --> 00:41:49,208 Tim Ardenne's books don't lie around. 224 00:41:49,375 --> 00:41:50,083 Which one? 225 00:41:50,708 --> 00:41:54,125 A book about trains and wrong directions... 226 00:41:54,542 --> 00:41:56,125 Steel and Sweat. 227 00:41:56,292 --> 00:41:58,167 - Did you like it? - Yes. 228 00:41:58,542 --> 00:42:02,708 I really liked his description of the female character. 229 00:42:04,708 --> 00:42:05,583 Is it you? 230 00:42:06,833 --> 00:42:08,458 He claims it is. 231 00:42:08,625 --> 00:42:10,542 But you know him. 232 00:42:12,333 --> 00:42:13,833 Has he always loved you? 233 00:42:14,500 --> 00:42:15,542 Yes. 234 00:42:16,500 --> 00:42:17,958 "As he walked, 235 00:42:18,125 --> 00:42:21,250 "her bright face was continually before him. 236 00:42:21,667 --> 00:42:24,625 "It was madness to think of such purity. 237 00:42:24,917 --> 00:42:26,708 "He had known vice and kindness, 238 00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:28,542 "but never purity." 239 00:42:29,333 --> 00:42:31,917 Purity... That's me to a T. 240 00:43:12,125 --> 00:43:12,917 Careful! 241 00:43:36,958 --> 00:43:38,375 "Die... 242 00:43:38,667 --> 00:43:40,625 "That's what you have to do. 243 00:43:41,792 --> 00:43:43,708 "That is the only way 244 00:43:43,875 --> 00:43:46,875 "to truly gain access to life. 245 00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:49,542 "One does not live 246 00:43:49,958 --> 00:43:52,958 "if one is not prepared to die. 247 00:43:53,917 --> 00:43:56,125 "Missing your own death 248 00:43:56,458 --> 00:43:59,292 "would be worse than anything else." 249 00:44:02,792 --> 00:44:04,083 Mr Ardenne? 250 00:44:07,375 --> 00:44:08,083 Tim? 251 00:44:10,083 --> 00:44:10,917 Yes? 252 00:44:11,500 --> 00:44:13,458 Dying as the only way 253 00:44:13,625 --> 00:44:15,875 to truly gain access to life. 254 00:44:17,125 --> 00:44:19,458 That's quite contradictory. 255 00:44:19,625 --> 00:44:20,625 Yes. 256 00:44:24,417 --> 00:44:25,875 You think so? 257 00:44:27,458 --> 00:44:28,792 I guess it is. 258 00:44:38,125 --> 00:44:40,250 If it requires explanation... 259 00:44:47,875 --> 00:44:49,583 It's all in here. 260 00:44:53,500 --> 00:44:56,542 The last part of the book is very funny. 261 00:44:57,167 --> 00:44:58,833 The surprising thing 262 00:44:59,708 --> 00:45:04,042 is that people in France laugh as much as they do in Germany. 263 00:45:04,333 --> 00:45:06,833 Could you define comedy for us? 264 00:45:07,417 --> 00:45:08,958 Absolutely not. 265 00:45:10,958 --> 00:45:13,667 But you agree the ending is funny? 266 00:45:19,667 --> 00:45:21,958 I can't stop people from laughing. 267 00:45:23,375 --> 00:45:25,750 What makes a good book for you? 268 00:45:26,167 --> 00:45:27,375 Alcohol. 269 00:45:28,417 --> 00:45:31,333 Is your success based on a misunderstanding? 270 00:45:33,208 --> 00:45:36,750 I don't think we're loved or hated for the right reasons. 271 00:45:39,667 --> 00:45:40,625 Ever. 272 00:45:49,333 --> 00:45:51,333 You first write in French, 273 00:45:51,500 --> 00:45:53,000 then again in German. 274 00:45:54,250 --> 00:45:56,208 Isn't that a little strange? 275 00:45:58,292 --> 00:46:00,500 I'd rather end the interview. 276 00:46:01,958 --> 00:46:03,792 I'm suffering too much. 277 00:46:04,958 --> 00:46:06,375 Why are you suffering? 278 00:46:11,833 --> 00:46:13,833 I'm in love, you understand? 279 00:46:14,292 --> 00:46:16,167 That's wonderful! 280 00:46:18,583 --> 00:46:20,167 I love Joan Verra. 281 00:46:23,542 --> 00:46:25,292 Your French publisher? 282 00:46:26,583 --> 00:46:28,083 She discovered me. 283 00:46:28,542 --> 00:46:29,792 Fantastic. 284 00:46:30,583 --> 00:46:32,000 She doesn't love me. 285 00:46:33,042 --> 00:46:35,250 I'm sure she likes you. 286 00:46:36,333 --> 00:46:40,333 The title, The Misery of Beautiful Days, where is it from? 287 00:46:41,917 --> 00:46:43,750 She doesn't love me. 288 00:46:45,250 --> 00:46:46,792 She likes me. 289 00:46:47,667 --> 00:46:49,250 She often says so. 290 00:46:51,250 --> 00:46:53,125 That's something, I suppose. 291 00:46:55,083 --> 00:46:57,583 She can even say, "I like you a lot." 292 00:47:00,042 --> 00:47:01,958 And that's really... 293 00:47:03,917 --> 00:47:06,125 That's really unbearable. 294 00:47:11,125 --> 00:47:12,167 Let's stop. 295 00:47:12,750 --> 00:47:14,208 It's for the best. 296 00:47:14,375 --> 00:47:16,125 I'll see you again soon. 297 00:47:17,625 --> 00:47:19,417 Off line, thank you. 298 00:47:29,333 --> 00:47:30,583 Why are you here? 299 00:47:30,750 --> 00:47:32,167 I had some free time. 300 00:47:32,583 --> 00:47:35,125 Rubbish, you can't skip school. 301 00:47:35,667 --> 00:47:37,458 Go back to Paris. I'm busy. 302 00:47:37,625 --> 00:47:40,542 He takes up all my energy. I'm working. 303 00:47:41,083 --> 00:47:43,250 It's ok, I know you're working. 304 00:47:43,417 --> 00:47:46,208 I'm not a child. I can manage on my own. 305 00:47:46,417 --> 00:47:47,583 How was I? 306 00:47:48,167 --> 00:47:49,458 Devastating. 307 00:47:50,333 --> 00:47:53,083 I could've shed real tears, you know. 308 00:47:53,750 --> 00:47:55,583 It would've been no use. 309 00:47:56,750 --> 00:47:58,167 You have no emotions. 310 00:47:58,333 --> 00:48:01,250 I have emotions, but different from yours. 311 00:48:03,333 --> 00:48:04,750 Forgive me. 312 00:48:20,208 --> 00:48:23,083 - What paid for your ticket? - Your jewels. 313 00:48:23,417 --> 00:48:24,500 Stupid. 314 00:48:27,542 --> 00:48:29,458 What's wrong now? 315 00:48:29,958 --> 00:48:31,500 I won't sign this crap. 316 00:48:31,792 --> 00:48:33,250 It's your first novel. 317 00:48:33,417 --> 00:48:34,917 It was a rough draft. 318 00:48:37,250 --> 00:48:39,042 The book is important for me. 319 00:48:39,208 --> 00:48:42,042 It changed my life. Literally. 320 00:48:42,750 --> 00:48:44,208 It's a masterpiece. 321 00:48:44,375 --> 00:48:45,375 A masterpiece? 322 00:48:45,542 --> 00:48:46,750 Nathan, please. 323 00:48:46,917 --> 00:48:49,875 I felt brought back to life, thanks to this book. 324 00:48:50,042 --> 00:48:52,208 I rediscovered my vitality. 325 00:48:52,625 --> 00:48:56,875 Through the life of a garbageman crushed to death by his truck? 326 00:48:57,292 --> 00:48:58,542 She seems moved. 327 00:49:00,375 --> 00:49:01,875 Good for her. 328 00:49:02,333 --> 00:49:03,917 And I have no emotions? 329 00:49:05,125 --> 00:49:07,042 You're all pissing me off! 330 00:49:15,833 --> 00:49:18,625 I can sign it if you like. 331 00:49:19,042 --> 00:49:21,792 I can imitate his signature perfectly. 332 00:49:32,625 --> 00:49:33,792 Are you ok? 333 00:49:37,583 --> 00:49:38,583 It's here. 334 00:49:39,417 --> 00:49:41,333 I feel it seeping in. 335 00:49:42,458 --> 00:49:45,083 It's harder and harder. 336 00:49:45,250 --> 00:49:47,375 Each time, it's harder. 337 00:49:47,667 --> 00:49:48,500 What is? 338 00:49:48,667 --> 00:49:49,792 Dying. 339 00:49:50,500 --> 00:49:52,042 Haven't you ever died? 340 00:49:52,583 --> 00:49:53,625 Never. 341 00:49:54,542 --> 00:49:56,708 I knew it. You can't understand. 342 00:49:56,875 --> 00:49:58,125 Give me your hand. 343 00:49:58,500 --> 00:50:01,083 Things end. 344 00:50:01,958 --> 00:50:05,083 That's how it is. They end. You must accept it. 345 00:50:05,792 --> 00:50:08,250 You have to be strong. Promise me? 346 00:50:08,417 --> 00:50:09,792 I promise. 347 00:50:11,125 --> 00:50:12,667 Beyond the grave, 348 00:50:12,958 --> 00:50:14,542 I'll still love you. 349 00:50:19,167 --> 00:50:20,583 He's a handful. 350 00:50:21,208 --> 00:50:22,875 It'd be no fun if he wasn't. 351 00:50:23,042 --> 00:50:24,250 Can you stand him? 352 00:50:24,417 --> 00:50:27,083 I actually find him touching in a way. 353 00:50:34,333 --> 00:50:36,875 You're like the moon and I'm the sun. 354 00:50:37,208 --> 00:50:38,250 Touching? 355 00:50:39,708 --> 00:50:41,167 He has his qualities. 356 00:50:44,875 --> 00:50:45,917 Come on! 357 00:50:53,417 --> 00:50:54,417 Move it! 358 00:50:56,917 --> 00:50:59,000 Don't you want to call a taxi? 359 00:50:59,250 --> 00:51:02,125 No use, we're only five minutes away. 360 00:51:02,625 --> 00:51:05,292 I'm in pain and I'm tired. 361 00:51:09,417 --> 00:51:10,500 Joan! 362 00:51:23,750 --> 00:51:24,708 Joan... 363 00:51:26,292 --> 00:51:28,042 I owe you an apology. 364 00:51:28,208 --> 00:51:29,333 That's true. 365 00:51:29,500 --> 00:51:31,750 For my behaviour, not for my love. 366 00:51:31,917 --> 00:51:33,458 - Tim... - Let me speak. 367 00:51:34,958 --> 00:51:38,083 It won't take long and I'll only say it once. 368 00:51:38,500 --> 00:51:40,542 I won't repeat this. After, 369 00:51:40,833 --> 00:51:42,458 I'll leave you in peace. 370 00:51:49,583 --> 00:51:51,792 Living without you is unbearable. 371 00:51:52,500 --> 00:51:55,667 Yet I try to break away from you. I really try. 372 00:51:56,417 --> 00:51:57,542 But I can't. 373 00:51:59,292 --> 00:52:02,583 I've always tried to be independent of women, 374 00:52:03,042 --> 00:52:05,375 to limit their power over me. 375 00:52:06,167 --> 00:52:08,417 I felt in control of my feelings. 376 00:52:09,792 --> 00:52:10,875 But then... 377 00:52:12,417 --> 00:52:16,542 you arrived in my life and I realized nothing I had lived... 378 00:52:18,833 --> 00:52:19,833 nothing... 379 00:52:20,417 --> 00:52:22,583 had any real value. 380 00:52:24,750 --> 00:52:28,417 All that mattered was being by your side. 381 00:52:29,000 --> 00:52:30,333 Or not too far away. 382 00:52:30,625 --> 00:52:32,458 Like these last few years. 383 00:52:35,417 --> 00:52:38,083 I also know that I'm unbearable. 384 00:52:38,583 --> 00:52:41,458 I understand that you feel like slapping me. 385 00:52:44,708 --> 00:52:45,792 Go ahead. 386 00:53:41,917 --> 00:53:44,208 What are you doing in Cologne? 387 00:53:44,792 --> 00:53:46,917 Three days apart was too much? 388 00:53:47,083 --> 00:53:48,458 I can't believe that. 389 00:53:54,417 --> 00:53:55,833 You searched my office? 390 00:53:58,083 --> 00:53:59,542 You read my notebooks? 391 00:54:01,250 --> 00:54:02,625 Of course you did. 392 00:54:03,500 --> 00:54:05,167 I never would have. 393 00:54:05,500 --> 00:54:06,583 Did you enjoy it? 394 00:54:06,917 --> 00:54:08,542 Yes, I enjoyed it. 395 00:54:09,708 --> 00:54:11,083 Did you learn anything? 396 00:54:11,250 --> 00:54:12,208 You bet. 397 00:54:12,583 --> 00:54:13,708 Such as what? 398 00:54:14,292 --> 00:54:15,542 About you and Doug. 399 00:54:16,458 --> 00:54:17,625 You won't say Dad? 400 00:54:17,875 --> 00:54:19,208 Why would I? 401 00:54:20,125 --> 00:54:22,083 I don't know what you learned. 402 00:54:22,792 --> 00:54:25,833 I never lied to you. I told you... 403 00:54:26,875 --> 00:54:27,667 everything. 404 00:54:27,833 --> 00:54:28,792 In general. 405 00:54:28,958 --> 00:54:30,625 Now I know the details. 406 00:54:30,875 --> 00:54:32,667 The magic of a first love. 407 00:54:32,958 --> 00:54:34,625 Irony doesn't suit you. 408 00:54:35,167 --> 00:54:36,333 You're hurt. 409 00:54:36,500 --> 00:54:38,458 There's stuff on me I don't like. 410 00:54:41,292 --> 00:54:42,625 I'm listening. 411 00:54:51,917 --> 00:54:53,167 "Friday, July 10th. 412 00:54:53,500 --> 00:54:57,167 "I fear Nathan may turn superficial, focused on his appearance." 413 00:54:57,333 --> 00:54:58,083 Nice. 414 00:54:59,125 --> 00:55:01,417 "Each hair he counts on his chest 415 00:55:01,583 --> 00:55:03,125 "is a personal victory." 416 00:55:03,292 --> 00:55:05,625 I never did that. It's humiliating. 417 00:55:06,125 --> 00:55:07,417 So don't read it. 418 00:55:07,583 --> 00:55:09,667 This is less well written, I feel. 419 00:55:09,833 --> 00:55:11,125 You're the expert. 420 00:55:11,375 --> 00:55:12,625 Don't be mean. 421 00:55:13,167 --> 00:55:14,292 I'm not. 422 00:55:17,208 --> 00:55:19,000 - Please... - Hold on. 423 00:55:19,917 --> 00:55:20,625 Enough. 424 00:55:20,792 --> 00:55:24,208 If you came about your puberty, I don't have time. 425 00:55:24,375 --> 00:55:26,625 I came cos you fell asleep one day. 426 00:55:26,792 --> 00:55:28,958 One summer. In August. 427 00:55:30,250 --> 00:55:31,542 Where is it? 428 00:57:31,125 --> 00:57:32,250 You fell asleep. 429 00:57:32,792 --> 00:57:33,833 Why? 430 00:57:34,708 --> 00:57:36,000 Out of carelessness? 431 00:57:37,083 --> 00:57:38,875 I forbid you to say that. 432 00:57:40,917 --> 00:57:42,167 You forbid me? 433 00:58:23,417 --> 00:58:24,833 Can I have a drag? 434 00:58:25,625 --> 00:58:27,250 - You smoke? - No. 435 00:58:44,167 --> 00:58:45,750 How long did it last? 436 00:58:45,958 --> 00:58:47,042 I don't know. 437 00:58:48,042 --> 00:58:51,333 How long was I unconscious? Ten minutes? Fifteen? 438 00:58:51,500 --> 00:58:52,833 I've no idea. 439 00:58:53,417 --> 00:58:55,500 I remember it seemed endless. 440 00:58:56,167 --> 00:58:58,333 Without the fire brigade... 441 00:58:59,958 --> 00:59:01,792 You weren't going to tell me? 442 00:59:03,958 --> 00:59:05,000 No. 443 00:59:05,792 --> 00:59:08,500 You're well, in shape. Nothing else matters. 444 00:59:10,625 --> 00:59:13,875 You can't even remember it. What are you after? 445 00:59:15,333 --> 00:59:17,417 You need reassuring, is that it? 446 00:59:18,083 --> 00:59:19,083 Yes. 447 00:59:21,750 --> 00:59:23,917 Doubt my love and I'll kill you. 448 00:59:32,167 --> 00:59:34,792 Same again, please. Vodka tonic. 449 00:59:40,333 --> 00:59:42,333 It burns? That's good. 450 00:59:42,792 --> 00:59:44,583 It explodes in your head. 451 00:59:44,750 --> 00:59:45,833 Perfect. 452 00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:48,750 You've drunk before, right? 453 00:59:50,583 --> 00:59:51,917 It's the first time? 454 00:59:53,625 --> 00:59:55,542 You've always been a bit behind. 455 00:59:59,833 --> 01:00:04,042 Nathan, you're a young man now. You'll be a real man soon. 456 01:00:04,208 --> 01:00:05,833 I won't talk sex with you. 457 01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:06,958 No. 458 01:00:07,250 --> 01:00:08,417 Listen to me. 459 01:00:08,792 --> 01:00:11,333 Your schooling in the next five years 460 01:00:11,667 --> 01:00:13,625 will determine your future. 461 01:00:14,167 --> 01:00:16,875 Do your learning now while you can. 462 01:00:17,042 --> 01:00:18,792 In five years, it'll be too late. 463 01:00:19,708 --> 01:00:22,750 Knowing you, you'll realize and find it unbearable. 464 01:00:23,167 --> 01:00:25,792 I won't be able to help, obviously. 465 01:00:25,958 --> 01:00:27,083 Obviously. 466 01:00:30,667 --> 01:00:32,958 You'll have to face problems alone. 467 01:00:33,667 --> 01:00:36,917 I'll be there if you need me, but that won't help. 468 01:00:40,042 --> 01:00:42,083 We have to face things alone. 469 01:00:48,042 --> 01:00:50,125 But you know that, right? 470 01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:52,958 No. 471 01:01:08,625 --> 01:01:09,542 Come on. 472 01:01:15,667 --> 01:01:18,083 Others' looks shouldn't matter. 473 01:01:19,292 --> 01:01:20,917 It's about your life. 474 01:01:29,042 --> 01:01:30,208 Stop it. 475 01:03:10,875 --> 01:03:12,000 Nathan? 476 01:03:14,417 --> 01:03:16,125 Nathan, are you awake? 477 01:03:17,375 --> 01:03:20,208 If you have a long nap now, you'll be a mess. 478 01:03:20,375 --> 01:03:22,167 You won't sleep tonight. 479 01:03:24,792 --> 01:03:25,958 Nathan? 480 01:03:27,125 --> 01:03:28,292 Can you hear me? 481 01:05:03,750 --> 01:05:04,458 Yes? 482 01:05:08,292 --> 01:05:09,500 We had an appointment? 483 01:05:09,917 --> 01:05:11,958 Do I need one to see my mother? 484 01:05:12,125 --> 01:05:15,208 Of course not. Sorry. My head's stuffed with work! 485 01:05:15,458 --> 01:05:16,875 I'll come back later. 486 01:05:18,125 --> 01:05:19,792 Champagne? Why? 487 01:05:21,167 --> 01:05:23,208 I forgot your birthday again? 488 01:05:23,375 --> 01:05:24,292 No. 489 01:05:24,542 --> 01:05:25,792 I had an interview. 490 01:05:25,958 --> 01:05:27,500 For a lab? You never said. 491 01:05:28,125 --> 01:05:29,583 I wanted to be sure. 492 01:05:29,917 --> 01:05:32,417 So guess who they chose. 493 01:05:34,375 --> 01:05:35,417 Your son. 494 01:05:35,750 --> 01:05:37,833 Wonderful! I'm proud of you. 495 01:05:38,000 --> 01:05:40,708 Now I'll have access to real resources, 496 01:05:40,875 --> 01:05:42,625 unlike what I have now, 497 01:05:42,833 --> 01:05:45,042 and with a totally free rein. 498 01:05:46,083 --> 01:05:48,042 And I'll be heading a team. 499 01:05:48,208 --> 01:05:49,542 My dream come true. 500 01:05:49,708 --> 01:05:52,750 I have to admit, it's scary to think about, 501 01:05:52,917 --> 01:05:54,292 so I try not to. 502 01:05:55,458 --> 01:05:56,958 You'll do brilliantly. 503 01:05:57,125 --> 01:05:59,333 It's a real dream. The building 504 01:05:59,500 --> 01:06:01,375 is modern, centralized. 505 01:06:01,542 --> 01:06:03,458 It's state-of-the-art over there. 506 01:06:06,250 --> 01:06:07,250 Over there? 507 01:06:09,792 --> 01:06:10,958 It's in Montreal. 508 01:06:26,625 --> 01:06:27,333 Joan? 509 01:06:28,417 --> 01:06:30,042 If you're happy... 510 01:06:32,250 --> 01:06:33,417 It's good. 511 01:06:37,167 --> 01:06:38,542 I need a cigarette. 512 01:06:39,042 --> 01:06:40,125 You have one. 513 01:06:41,583 --> 01:06:43,042 I need another. 514 01:06:45,167 --> 01:06:47,000 You don't seem pleased. 515 01:06:49,625 --> 01:06:51,875 I am. I'm very happy for you. 516 01:06:52,167 --> 01:06:53,625 But seeing you leave... 517 01:06:55,167 --> 01:06:57,167 Children leave their parents. 518 01:06:58,083 --> 01:06:59,458 Sooner or later. 519 01:07:00,917 --> 01:07:02,792 I'm 30, after all. 520 01:07:04,125 --> 01:07:04,917 So? 521 01:07:11,708 --> 01:07:13,792 Forgive me. I'm being stupid. 522 01:07:16,667 --> 01:07:18,167 I'll come back often. 523 01:07:18,750 --> 01:07:21,583 You can visit too. You don't know Quebec. 524 01:07:22,292 --> 01:07:23,625 It's really nice. 525 01:07:27,375 --> 01:07:28,625 Want that champagne? 526 01:07:29,833 --> 01:07:31,375 I'll get the glasses. 527 01:07:52,583 --> 01:07:53,625 Where were you? 528 01:07:53,792 --> 01:07:55,708 An errand in the village. 529 01:07:55,875 --> 01:07:57,583 - On foot? - Yes. 530 01:07:57,875 --> 01:07:59,250 Whatever for? 531 01:07:59,417 --> 01:08:00,958 "Did you rest, dear?" 532 01:08:01,833 --> 01:08:03,208 "Yes, thank you." 533 01:08:03,458 --> 01:08:06,125 "Your jet lag from the flight to see your mum?" 534 01:08:06,417 --> 01:08:07,833 "I'll get over it soon." 535 01:08:08,000 --> 01:08:09,458 "Will it be sunny?" 536 01:08:09,625 --> 01:08:11,417 I hate when you do that! 537 01:08:11,625 --> 01:08:13,292 I was worried sick. 538 01:08:13,458 --> 01:08:14,875 Why, exactly? 539 01:08:16,500 --> 01:08:17,667 I'm a big boy now. 540 01:08:17,958 --> 01:08:19,458 Why leave me alone? 541 01:08:19,625 --> 01:08:21,583 I couldn't sleep, 542 01:08:21,750 --> 01:08:24,167 you weren't around and I needed a walk. 543 01:08:24,333 --> 01:08:25,583 I was here. 544 01:08:25,917 --> 01:08:28,042 You can't vanish like that. 545 01:08:29,083 --> 01:08:30,292 I didn't vanish. 546 01:08:30,625 --> 01:08:32,250 Mum, calm down. 547 01:08:32,417 --> 01:08:34,250 No, I don't want to! 548 01:08:41,833 --> 01:08:44,042 Find something to do, I'll tidy up. 549 01:08:47,750 --> 01:08:49,708 If you came to mess me about, 550 01:08:49,958 --> 01:08:52,000 pack up and go back to Montreal. 551 01:08:53,250 --> 01:08:54,250 Drop it. 552 01:08:56,000 --> 01:08:58,208 Still like doughnut peaches? 553 01:08:58,375 --> 01:08:59,292 Yes. 554 01:08:59,708 --> 01:09:02,042 I got some for you. Was it a good idea? 555 01:09:02,667 --> 01:09:04,000 I wonder. 556 01:10:02,542 --> 01:10:04,750 "He had finally met her. 557 01:10:05,000 --> 01:10:06,000 "The woman, 558 01:10:06,417 --> 01:10:09,417 "the one he had waited for without realizing it, 559 01:10:09,583 --> 01:10:11,417 "the one destined for him. 560 01:10:11,792 --> 01:10:13,542 "He had looked into her soul 561 01:10:13,708 --> 01:10:17,125 "and had grasped her rare special something, 562 01:10:17,708 --> 01:10:20,458 "as beautiful as the eyes reflecting it, 563 01:10:20,708 --> 01:10:23,417 "as beautiful as the flesh embodying it. 564 01:10:24,000 --> 01:10:26,292 "Not one word, not one sign, 565 01:10:26,583 --> 01:10:30,542 "not one word of advice from the Divine had guided him. 566 01:10:30,792 --> 01:10:32,875 "He didn't believe in the Divine. 567 01:10:33,333 --> 01:10:35,417 "There was no beyond. 568 01:10:35,583 --> 01:10:37,417 "He was sure of it. 569 01:10:37,875 --> 01:10:39,542 "Life had to be lived, 570 01:10:39,958 --> 01:10:43,583 "here and now, before sinking into the void." 571 01:10:45,708 --> 01:10:46,958 It's magnificent. 572 01:10:47,500 --> 01:10:48,750 You can't deny it. 573 01:10:48,917 --> 01:10:50,750 It's great, easy to read. 574 01:10:51,917 --> 01:10:53,125 Very pleasant. 575 01:10:56,250 --> 01:10:57,375 Pleasant? 576 01:10:57,958 --> 01:11:00,500 - Is that an insult? - Not at all. 577 01:11:00,792 --> 01:11:03,083 You certainly don't disappoint us. 578 01:11:03,792 --> 01:11:06,583 Really, it's exactly what we expect of you. 579 01:11:07,250 --> 01:11:08,875 You must be very pleased. 580 01:11:11,250 --> 01:11:13,250 You insult me so naturally. 581 01:11:13,417 --> 01:11:15,875 I was bored stiff! It's the same recipe. 582 01:11:16,042 --> 01:11:18,000 I've read it ten times before. 583 01:11:18,208 --> 01:11:20,208 I may be wrong, but this line... 584 01:11:23,625 --> 01:11:25,667 "There was no beyond. He was sure of it. 585 01:11:25,833 --> 01:11:28,417 "Life had to be lived, here and now, before sinking into the void." 586 01:11:28,583 --> 01:11:30,667 Wasn't that in your last novel? 587 01:11:30,833 --> 01:11:32,500 And the one before too? 588 01:11:35,042 --> 01:11:37,000 I assert a right to repetition. 589 01:11:37,167 --> 01:11:40,667 People will end up realizing I've only written one book 590 01:11:40,833 --> 01:11:43,083 that took on different forms. 591 01:11:43,750 --> 01:11:45,750 All great artists dig a furrow. 592 01:11:45,917 --> 01:11:47,333 More like a tunnel. 593 01:11:47,500 --> 01:11:50,375 The train driver blending with his engine, 594 01:11:50,542 --> 01:11:51,958 you call that new? 595 01:11:52,125 --> 01:11:54,792 He doesn't die, crushed by the machine. 596 01:11:56,708 --> 01:11:57,792 I guess... 597 01:12:00,250 --> 01:12:01,708 Show me your breasts? 598 01:12:02,500 --> 01:12:03,583 No. 599 01:12:03,958 --> 01:12:04,958 You hesitated. 600 01:12:05,417 --> 01:12:08,375 Of course, you turn me on and that annoys me. 601 01:12:09,042 --> 01:12:10,542 But I know your game. 602 01:12:10,708 --> 01:12:12,458 Sex as a diversionary tactic 603 01:12:12,792 --> 01:12:13,833 is pathetic. 604 01:12:15,208 --> 01:12:18,000 The first part, the kid watching trains, 605 01:12:18,167 --> 01:12:18,917 who cares? 606 01:12:19,083 --> 01:12:20,708 We want to be on the tracks. 607 01:12:20,875 --> 01:12:22,375 We want movement! 608 01:12:27,917 --> 01:12:30,417 And the affair with his boss' wife... 609 01:12:30,583 --> 01:12:32,292 Talk about tasteless! 610 01:12:36,625 --> 01:12:38,250 It compromises the ending. 611 01:12:41,375 --> 01:12:42,583 We need a rewrite. 612 01:12:47,292 --> 01:12:48,167 Hello? 613 01:12:51,417 --> 01:12:53,875 It's the Saint-Nazaire housing office. 614 01:12:54,042 --> 01:12:58,750 I'm calling about overdue rent on apartment B14 at Ambroise Paré. 615 01:12:59,958 --> 01:13:03,292 There must be some mistake. I don't understand. 616 01:13:03,458 --> 01:13:06,125 You are Madeleine Verra's daughter? 617 01:13:06,542 --> 01:13:08,292 It must be a homonym. 618 01:13:08,458 --> 01:13:11,500 My mother moved to Japan over twenty years ago. 619 01:13:11,667 --> 01:13:14,208 She was Madeleine Joséphine Verra, 620 01:13:14,667 --> 01:13:17,125 née Saulet on October 14, 1942, 621 01:13:17,292 --> 01:13:18,500 in Saint-Nazaire 622 01:13:19,000 --> 01:13:20,667 who died last week? 623 01:13:26,208 --> 01:13:27,208 Hello? 624 01:13:29,042 --> 01:13:30,208 Yes... 625 01:13:31,708 --> 01:13:36,042 You need to clear the apartment. There's a waiting list. Sorry. 626 01:13:37,417 --> 01:13:39,292 Yes, all right. 627 01:13:46,000 --> 01:13:47,875 We get a lot of deaths here. 628 01:13:48,708 --> 01:13:50,583 But hers really wasn't fair. 629 01:13:51,792 --> 01:13:54,333 People liked her. She helped out a lot. 630 01:13:54,958 --> 01:13:56,792 They'd leave her their kids. 631 01:13:57,083 --> 01:13:59,417 She'd babysit for a bit of money. 632 01:13:59,583 --> 01:14:00,833 She needed it. 633 01:14:02,375 --> 01:14:05,250 I never saw anyone so good with kids. 634 01:14:05,583 --> 01:14:06,958 What a joke... 635 01:14:10,458 --> 01:14:14,083 We invited her once for Christmas. Something simple. 636 01:14:14,250 --> 01:14:15,167 She refused. 637 01:14:15,333 --> 01:14:17,792 That wasn't nice. We did it for her sake. 638 01:14:17,958 --> 01:14:19,875 You accept an invitation. 639 01:14:20,042 --> 01:14:22,208 We'll bring them back later. 640 01:14:22,667 --> 01:14:24,250 It's the last door. 641 01:16:18,292 --> 01:16:19,458 I'm here. 642 01:16:52,083 --> 01:16:54,333 What the hell was she doing here? 643 01:16:54,875 --> 01:16:56,542 What is this shit? 644 01:16:56,958 --> 01:16:58,417 When did she come back? 645 01:16:58,917 --> 01:17:01,000 These are her rent receipts. 646 01:17:02,417 --> 01:17:06,250 The oldest one is from November 1989. 647 01:17:06,958 --> 01:17:08,875 That's over fifteen years ago. 648 01:17:10,083 --> 01:17:12,750 How come she never told us? 649 01:17:15,667 --> 01:17:17,750 What did we do to deserve this? 650 01:17:17,917 --> 01:17:20,500 It's sick. I was alone with Nathan. 651 01:17:21,708 --> 01:17:23,125 It's really sick. 652 01:17:23,542 --> 01:17:24,750 Don't say that. 653 01:17:26,917 --> 01:17:28,583 Who knows what happened. 654 01:17:29,958 --> 01:17:31,875 Nothing, apparently. 655 01:17:41,625 --> 01:17:43,708 She'd planned her own funeral. 656 01:17:43,875 --> 01:17:45,042 A long time ago. 657 01:17:45,792 --> 01:17:47,708 On arriving back here. 658 01:17:50,750 --> 01:17:52,708 She even deprived us of her death. 659 01:17:53,417 --> 01:17:55,167 Her ashes were scattered 660 01:17:55,333 --> 01:17:56,875 in the local cemetery. 661 01:17:59,875 --> 01:18:01,958 There's a sealed envelope. 662 01:18:22,250 --> 01:18:25,792 Excuse me, the garden of remembrance, please? 663 01:18:25,958 --> 01:18:29,292 Over there. The memorial area is being remodelled. 664 01:18:31,167 --> 01:18:32,292 Thank you. 665 01:18:33,208 --> 01:18:34,625 Memorial area... 666 01:19:02,417 --> 01:19:04,458 "Joan, my darling little girl, 667 01:19:04,625 --> 01:19:07,042 "Don't seek an explanation in these words. 668 01:19:07,208 --> 01:19:08,750 "Life is elusive. 669 01:19:08,917 --> 01:19:11,542 "I have no answers. I regret nothing. 670 01:19:11,833 --> 01:19:14,708 "Leaving for Japan was a wonderful adventure. 671 01:19:14,917 --> 01:19:17,167 "You've no idea how... 672 01:19:18,667 --> 01:19:19,583 "how... 673 01:19:20,250 --> 01:19:21,458 "happy I was there. 674 01:19:21,625 --> 01:19:24,833 "I found my place and culture. It's so beautiful. 675 01:19:25,083 --> 01:19:27,667 "Cherry blossom season is magical. 676 01:19:27,833 --> 01:19:30,958 "Kazuo and I opened a small bonsai tree shop. 677 01:19:31,500 --> 01:19:35,125 "I became a specialist, almost a celebrity. 678 01:19:35,292 --> 01:19:37,458 "Just think, a European 679 01:19:37,625 --> 01:19:40,417 "outdoing the Japanese in their ancient art. 680 01:19:40,750 --> 01:19:43,042 "They'd cross the country to see me. 681 01:19:43,417 --> 01:19:45,542 "But Kazuo piled up gambling debts. 682 01:19:45,708 --> 01:19:47,625 "He owed money to Yakuza. 683 01:19:47,833 --> 01:19:50,917 "As he couldn't pay, he became their henchman. 684 01:19:51,083 --> 01:19:52,667 "But he kept gambling. 685 01:19:52,917 --> 01:19:55,792 "I found all that out when we had to flee. 686 01:19:55,958 --> 01:19:58,375 "We moved to South Korea. 687 01:19:58,542 --> 01:20:01,042 "We lived humbly, but we were in love. 688 01:20:01,208 --> 01:20:02,417 "That was the main thing." 689 01:20:02,583 --> 01:20:04,208 Even in death, she lies. 690 01:20:05,667 --> 01:20:08,667 "I'm lying, of course. I lie in writing this. 691 01:20:08,833 --> 01:20:11,542 "Should I say that I made a mistake, 692 01:20:11,708 --> 01:20:14,500 "that Kazuo was always a total asshole, 693 01:20:14,667 --> 01:20:17,333 "and that I lived in solitude and shame? 694 01:20:17,583 --> 01:20:20,250 "Frankly, which version do you prefer? 695 01:20:23,250 --> 01:20:25,583 "I never stopped thinking of you all, 696 01:20:26,000 --> 01:20:29,083 "refusing to admit my weakness and my failure. 697 01:20:29,250 --> 01:20:31,375 "Make your life magical, 698 01:20:33,542 --> 01:20:35,167 "my darling little girl. 699 01:20:36,042 --> 01:20:37,958 "I've been happy, you know. 700 01:20:40,875 --> 01:20:44,000 "Remember that. I loved living." 701 01:21:13,458 --> 01:21:15,125 "I would like the dead 702 01:21:15,375 --> 01:21:16,667 "to stay dead. 703 01:21:17,458 --> 01:21:20,333 "Why should they rule over me? 704 01:21:21,125 --> 01:21:23,042 "Beauty is alive 705 01:21:23,542 --> 01:21:25,042 "and it is eternal." 706 01:21:31,333 --> 01:21:34,875 "Beauty is alive and it is eternal." 707 01:21:37,417 --> 01:21:38,625 You believe that? 708 01:21:39,708 --> 01:21:40,625 No. 709 01:21:42,417 --> 01:21:43,458 All the same... 710 01:21:47,375 --> 01:21:48,958 What do we drink to? 711 01:21:50,667 --> 01:21:53,208 We drink to my mother, I suppose. 712 01:21:54,750 --> 01:21:56,042 And to Japan. 713 01:21:57,750 --> 01:22:01,333 We should have brought sake to drink on her grave. 714 01:22:01,875 --> 01:22:03,708 That would have had style. 715 01:22:17,208 --> 01:22:18,792 We did a new experiment. 716 01:22:20,000 --> 01:22:22,542 We managed to erase a memory in a brain. 717 01:22:22,917 --> 01:22:23,833 No! 718 01:22:24,000 --> 01:22:25,583 A mouse's brain. 719 01:22:26,958 --> 01:22:28,167 Can mice swim? 720 01:22:28,333 --> 01:22:29,583 Yes, very well. 721 01:22:30,292 --> 01:22:31,750 But that's not the issue. 722 01:22:32,000 --> 01:22:34,583 We put a plastic platform in the pool, 723 01:22:34,750 --> 01:22:36,750 the same colour as the liquid. 724 01:22:37,917 --> 01:22:39,042 Very hard to see. 725 01:22:39,208 --> 01:22:42,125 The mouse has to find it to rest on it. 726 01:22:42,708 --> 01:22:44,208 It's the only solution. 727 01:22:44,500 --> 01:22:46,667 It takes time, but she finds it. 728 01:22:47,125 --> 01:22:49,083 - Poor thing. - What? 729 01:22:49,250 --> 01:22:50,833 You hate mice. 730 01:22:52,125 --> 01:22:53,000 The next day, 731 01:22:53,167 --> 01:22:55,583 we do it again with the same mouse 732 01:22:56,167 --> 01:22:57,667 who remembers everything. 733 01:22:57,833 --> 01:23:00,417 She swims straight to the platform 734 01:23:00,583 --> 01:23:01,583 without hesitation. 735 01:23:01,750 --> 01:23:03,208 She knows where it is. 736 01:23:03,542 --> 01:23:04,708 She has learned. 737 01:23:04,875 --> 01:23:06,083 Fascinating. 738 01:23:06,375 --> 01:23:08,667 Day three, we start again. 739 01:23:09,083 --> 01:23:12,458 But we inject a substance that blocks the memory. 740 01:23:12,958 --> 01:23:15,292 I knew torture would be involved. 741 01:23:15,875 --> 01:23:18,333 She totally forgot her memories. 742 01:23:19,250 --> 01:23:21,500 It's as if she has lost her memory. 743 01:23:21,833 --> 01:23:23,417 She swims and swims. 744 01:23:23,958 --> 01:23:25,042 She swims. 745 01:23:26,125 --> 01:23:27,167 She swims... 746 01:23:30,083 --> 01:23:31,250 She swims... 747 01:24:30,750 --> 01:24:31,792 Mum... 748 01:24:37,667 --> 01:24:38,625 Mum? 749 01:26:23,083 --> 01:26:24,250 It's over. 750 01:26:33,875 --> 01:26:35,583 You shouldn't have died. 751 01:26:42,083 --> 01:26:43,667 No one dies aged six. 752 01:26:46,333 --> 01:26:47,375 Sorry. 753 01:26:50,542 --> 01:26:51,583 Sorry. 754 01:26:52,542 --> 01:26:53,917 It's not your fault. 755 01:26:55,542 --> 01:26:56,958 Of course it is. 756 01:26:58,083 --> 01:26:59,167 No. 757 01:27:01,333 --> 01:27:02,792 You were so young. 758 01:27:11,958 --> 01:27:13,333 You're so handsome. 759 01:27:23,417 --> 01:27:24,583 My little mum... 760 01:27:32,375 --> 01:27:33,583 It'll be ok. 761 01:27:35,917 --> 01:27:37,000 It'll be ok. 762 01:27:52,167 --> 01:27:54,375 After you died, it all fell apart. 763 01:27:55,042 --> 01:27:56,333 I was lost. 764 01:27:57,000 --> 01:27:58,458 What should I do? 765 01:28:00,000 --> 01:28:02,208 I was waiting for who knows what. 766 01:28:03,542 --> 01:28:06,750 Then one day, at a street corner, you appeared. 767 01:28:06,958 --> 01:28:08,750 As if nothing had happened. 768 01:28:09,083 --> 01:28:11,000 The way you do so well. 769 01:28:11,500 --> 01:28:14,250 It was obvious. A secret. 770 01:28:14,542 --> 01:28:15,542 Our secret. 771 01:28:15,708 --> 01:28:16,917 Exactly. 772 01:28:17,083 --> 01:28:19,458 The grief faded and I accepted it. 773 01:28:19,958 --> 01:28:21,375 You did well to summon me. 774 01:28:21,542 --> 01:28:22,958 As if I had a choice. 775 01:28:23,125 --> 01:28:25,750 True, at first, it scared me a little. 776 01:28:26,792 --> 01:28:28,750 Everything scares you a little. 777 01:28:28,917 --> 01:28:29,958 Not true! 778 01:28:30,125 --> 01:28:31,333 You hypocrite. 779 01:28:31,500 --> 01:28:33,375 I'm a hypocrite? 780 01:28:33,708 --> 01:28:35,167 Coming from you? 781 01:28:37,750 --> 01:28:39,000 Did you see him again? 782 01:28:39,167 --> 01:28:41,042 - Who? - You know who. 783 01:28:42,208 --> 01:28:43,292 Your father? 784 01:28:44,125 --> 01:28:46,583 Yes, in Paris, on the street, by chance. 785 01:28:46,833 --> 01:28:48,000 What's he like? 786 01:28:49,125 --> 01:28:51,000 He has aged. He has changed. 787 01:28:51,667 --> 01:28:52,958 Like me, I suppose. 788 01:28:53,125 --> 01:28:54,042 No. 789 01:28:55,000 --> 01:28:56,125 You're sweet. 790 01:28:58,875 --> 01:29:00,250 You didn't tell him? 791 01:29:02,042 --> 01:29:04,875 That you had been born and that you died? No. 792 01:29:05,458 --> 01:29:07,000 There was no need. 793 01:29:07,333 --> 01:29:08,542 It was cruel. 794 01:29:10,875 --> 01:29:12,083 I've no idea. 795 01:29:12,708 --> 01:29:14,125 Maybe I should have. 796 01:29:15,125 --> 01:29:16,250 I don't know. 797 01:29:20,375 --> 01:29:21,917 It's a beautiful house. 798 01:29:23,333 --> 01:29:24,708 It was. 799 01:29:50,083 --> 01:29:52,750 What are you doing alone in the dark? 800 01:29:54,500 --> 01:29:55,458 Nothing. 801 01:29:59,208 --> 01:30:00,625 Did you fight again? 802 01:30:00,792 --> 01:30:01,750 Yes. 803 01:30:02,167 --> 01:30:03,625 Over a girl again? 804 01:30:05,167 --> 01:30:06,208 Why then? 805 01:30:06,583 --> 01:30:08,167 She has soft skin. 806 01:30:08,708 --> 01:30:10,042 That's no reason. 807 01:30:10,875 --> 01:30:13,000 How do you know her skin's soft? 808 01:30:13,833 --> 01:30:17,708 I hold her hand and the skin under her wrist is soft. 809 01:30:17,917 --> 01:30:20,125 Where do you get your aggressiveness? 810 01:30:20,750 --> 01:30:22,083 Not from me anyhow. 811 01:30:22,917 --> 01:30:24,208 My father, maybe? 812 01:30:24,375 --> 01:30:25,292 No. 813 01:30:26,333 --> 01:30:28,708 No, Doug wasn't like that. 814 01:30:30,667 --> 01:30:34,000 I think you have to know how to defend yourself in life. 815 01:30:37,708 --> 01:30:39,708 I must tell you something, my love. 816 01:30:40,208 --> 01:30:41,250 What? 817 01:30:43,042 --> 01:30:45,708 Your presence has helped all these years. 818 01:30:45,875 --> 01:30:47,875 I know. I noticed. 819 01:30:49,000 --> 01:30:51,083 But I need you to leave now. 820 01:30:53,458 --> 01:30:54,917 I can manage differently. 821 01:30:55,083 --> 01:30:56,292 I can tell. 822 01:31:00,292 --> 01:31:02,042 You want me to go? 823 01:31:08,292 --> 01:31:09,458 Are you sad? 824 01:31:10,000 --> 01:31:11,000 No. 825 01:31:18,917 --> 01:31:21,250 I can tell you are. I'm your mother. 826 01:31:25,708 --> 01:31:27,292 Is it over then? 827 01:31:29,708 --> 01:31:30,708 Yes. 828 01:33:31,042 --> 01:33:32,083 You came. 829 01:33:33,417 --> 01:33:34,792 You're stubborn. 830 01:33:36,208 --> 01:33:38,000 I sensed I had to. 831 01:33:49,625 --> 01:33:50,625 Are you ok? 832 01:33:52,167 --> 01:33:53,333 I'll be fine. 833 01:34:16,458 --> 01:34:17,917 The stairs creak a bit? 834 01:34:18,083 --> 01:34:20,250 Part of the charm of an old house. 835 01:34:20,417 --> 01:34:23,500 Old stones, creaking stairs, banging shutters. 836 01:34:23,667 --> 01:34:26,167 - Why bother otherwise? - I love it. 837 01:34:26,333 --> 01:34:27,500 Me too. 838 01:34:30,333 --> 01:34:34,292 This room faces south-west and is sunny all day. 839 01:34:34,792 --> 01:34:36,542 The view is wonderful. 840 01:34:39,292 --> 01:34:41,708 There's direct access to the kitchen. 841 01:34:42,417 --> 01:34:46,792 Maybe we could demolish this to open the kitchen to the dining room. 842 01:34:47,000 --> 01:34:48,167 Good idea. 843 01:34:48,333 --> 01:34:49,792 Isn't it a bearing wall? 844 01:34:49,958 --> 01:34:54,083 Behind the cupboards, yes, but you can put in an IPN beam. 845 01:34:54,375 --> 01:34:56,250 But this one can go. 846 01:35:01,458 --> 01:35:02,583 And the roof? 847 01:35:04,792 --> 01:35:05,958 It's great. 848 01:35:06,292 --> 01:35:07,583 In good condition? 849 01:35:08,292 --> 01:35:09,792 Never a problem. 850 01:35:11,375 --> 01:35:13,125 I'll let you talk it over. 851 01:35:13,292 --> 01:35:15,292 Feel free to go back upstairs. 852 01:35:15,625 --> 01:35:18,125 Any questions, I'll be in the garden. 853 01:35:18,500 --> 01:35:20,292 - See you shortly. - Thank you. 854 01:35:57,000 --> 01:35:59,000 Is there a manual in German? 855 01:35:59,167 --> 01:36:02,250 No, my dear friend, only in French. 856 01:36:03,792 --> 01:36:06,125 You told them I was your gardener? 857 01:36:06,458 --> 01:36:09,625 Yes, I suggested making you part of the deal. 858 01:36:09,792 --> 01:36:11,458 Not gifted, but cheap. 859 01:36:12,917 --> 01:36:14,208 I'm flattered. 860 01:36:15,125 --> 01:36:16,500 Are they interested? 861 01:36:17,000 --> 01:36:19,417 Hard to say. The husband's fussy. 862 01:36:19,583 --> 01:36:23,292 I said I had someone coming back tomorrow with an offer. 863 01:36:23,625 --> 01:36:24,750 That's not true. 864 01:36:24,917 --> 01:36:26,875 Yes, but it got them thinking. 865 01:36:28,208 --> 01:36:32,542 Why mow a lawn since the grass always grows back? 866 01:36:33,167 --> 01:36:35,167 It's the cycle of life, right? 867 01:36:35,708 --> 01:36:36,875 So that's it. 868 01:36:37,250 --> 01:36:38,250 Life. 869 01:36:39,000 --> 01:36:40,333 How much longer? 870 01:36:42,833 --> 01:36:44,625 I love you, Mr Tim Ardenne. 871 01:36:45,625 --> 01:36:47,292 You saved my life, sir. 872 01:36:51,500 --> 01:36:53,125 It was an honour to meet you. 873 01:36:53,292 --> 01:36:56,375 No, we said we'd never say such things. 874 01:36:57,250 --> 01:36:58,667 I might cry. 875 01:37:00,083 --> 01:37:01,500 My bad. 876 01:37:05,958 --> 01:37:09,083 As a child, I hated daylight. It terrified me. 877 01:37:09,292 --> 01:37:10,875 Now, I find it reassuring. 878 01:37:11,417 --> 01:37:13,833 We should move closer to the poles. 879 01:37:14,583 --> 01:37:16,708 Go where the sun never sets? 880 01:37:17,333 --> 01:37:18,125 Good idea. 881 01:37:18,292 --> 01:37:19,458 Greenland. 882 01:37:20,000 --> 01:37:21,542 We'd live in an igloo. 883 01:37:23,083 --> 01:37:26,542 We'd cut holes in the ice to fish. 884 01:37:27,167 --> 01:37:28,500 You hate the cold, 885 01:37:28,667 --> 01:37:31,958 but I'll buy you thick sweaters and scarves. 886 01:37:33,250 --> 01:37:34,458 Woollen ones. 887 01:37:35,375 --> 01:37:36,875 And a woolly hat too. 888 01:37:37,792 --> 01:37:39,083 It would suit you. 889 01:41:13,667 --> 01:41:16,292 Subtitling TITRAFILM